Confidence in Social Situations
Entry # 34
Do you sometimes feel shy or awkward in social situations?
Have you ever been to a social gathering where you've felt awkward and uncomfortable, or attended social events where you sometimes find yourself wishing you were someplace else?
Please know that are you are not alone. Many people, including me, admit to feeling the same way too. In fact, for a long period in my life whenever I was invited to a social gathering I would feel fear and panic and consequently made excuses for not attending the event. I did not understand why and felt confused because I knew that the social gatherings would be fun, especially since I would be surrounded by people whose company I enjoyed!
The truth is that even happy occasions can sometimes be the cause of much anxiety and self-consciousness. We may even feel like everyone else is having a good time except for us. Yet the truth is that everyone has felt shy and awkward on occasion. One of the best ways to overcome self-consciousness or get past your feelings of shyness at social gatherings is to focus on the people around you. If you can remember that other people might also be feeling awkward or shy, you might find the thought of speaking to them less intimidating or overwhelming.
Tips On How To Manage Stress
Entry # 33
Most of us find ourselves having high demands on our time and as a result experience stress on the daily. In this post I would like to share with you 4 simple tips on how you can effectively manage stress. But first, I have a challenge for you that is going to feel a bit uncomfortable.
Ready? I want you to try to eliminate using the word STRESS whenever possible, and instead, say, “I’m inviting GRACE AND EASE into my life."
Why? Because energy grows where energy goes, and I want you to move in the direction of where you are going vs. where you’ve been for a long time. This shift in perspective was a huge one for me!
Now for my few tips on how to manage stress:
1. When your to-do list is a mile long, move some of your “by when” dates to more realistic ones.
2. Look at your list and see how many things fall into the URGENT category vs. the IMPORTANT category. Very few things are truly urgent, and when you operate in urgent mode all the time, it is hard to experience grace and ease.
3. Get it all out of your head and onto the list. Make your list, and then break down each item into smaller steps or sub tasks.
4. Practice deep breathing. Did you know that your body cannot experience stress while you're taking deep breaths? The way you breathe affects your whole body. Breathing exercises are a good way to relax, reduce tension, and relieve stress.
Have you ever noticed how you breathe when you feel relaxed and how relaxed you feel when you breathe deeply?
How amazing is that?
Why don't you have a go at these 4 tips now and see how you feel!
Our Unique Purpose
Entry # 32
Each one of us comes into this life with a unique purpose. There is something very specific that we are here to be, to do or to create, that will enhance the lives of all those we come in contact with, and bring us the greatest joy and deepest fulfilment in the process.
The natural next step is for us to create a clear vision for our future that is aligned with our true calling, so that we have something to actually live into. One of the ways of creating that clear vision is through meditation. Meditation is simply a way of quieting the mind, a way of silencing the mental chatter, so we can relax and hear our inner voice, the "small, quiet voice within" that always seeks to guide us toward a life of purpose, fulfilment, happiness and joy.
I want you to know that here is no coincidence in the Universe, and nothing happens by chance or by accident. Each event and adventure is called to our Self by our Self in order that we might create and experience who we really are. It is no accident that you find yourself reading this blog. It is an opportunity for you to seek and gain greater clarity around your life's purpose and to align your life with it.
Being Comfortable With Our Sadness And Grief
Entry # 31
Last week was a particularly sad one for me as I mourned the passing of a loved one. As I shared my feelings of grief with a friend, I was reminded that, allowing ourselves to feel our sadness takes the courage to believe that we can bear the pain of our loss and still know that we will come out safely on the other side.
The last thing most of us want to hear or think about when we are dealing with profound feelings of sadness is that deep learning can be found in this place. In the midst of our pain, we often feel picked on by life, or overwhelmed by the enormity of some loss, or simply too exhausted to try and examine the situation. We may feel far too disappointed and angry to look for anything resembling a bright side to our suffering. Still, somewhere in our hearts, we know that we will eventually emerge from the depths into the light of greater awareness. Remembering this truth, no matter how elusive it seems, can help.
The other thing we often would rather not hear when we are dealing with intense sadness is that the only way out of it is through it. Sitting with our sadness takes the courage to believe that we can bear the pain and the faith that we will come out the other side. With courage, we can allow ourselves to cycle through the grieving process with full inner permission to experience it. This is a powerful teaching that sadness has to offer us the ability to surrender and the acceptance of change go hand in hand.
Another teaching of sadness is compassion for others who are in pain, because it is only in feeling our own pain that we can really understand and allow for someone else's. Sadness is something we all go through, and we all learn from it and are deepened by its presence in our lives.
It has only been a few days since my dear friend Grace was laid to rest and so I am still dealing with profound feelings of sadness.
But I choose to believe that our own individual experiences of sadness carry unique lessons, and the wisdom gained from going through the process of feeling loss, heartbreak, or deep disappointment gives us access to the heart of humanity.
Your friend in unlimited prosperity,
No Greater Creator Than You!
Entry # 30
"There is no greater creator than you and no greater reason to create than the things you desire to have in your life!"
But, as everyone of us at some point has learned, focusing on the way we want our lives to be when things are not going our way in the present moment, is not the easiest thing to do. But if we have the determination to focus our attention in every area of our lives as we want it to be, rather than as it is, our lives will change dramatically.
Everything that we create is for the expressed purpose of the joyous satisfaction that it gives us as the source within us expands.
With every thought we think, with every desire we give birth to, the Universe expands. And it is only through our joyous quest that all of this is possible.
If we continually choose to feel good by focusing on what we want instead of on what we don't want, we will begin to notice the instant, benevolent and cooperative response of the Universe responding to our desires. As we do, we will quickly become someone who is willing to let go of everything and anything that is not part of our vibration. We will let bygones be bygones, the grudges and mistakes of others (and your own), complaints and ill-wishes, injustice and bad behaviour all become things of the past.
It is my sincere desire dear friend, that you think enough of yourself to want to feel good and do whatever it takes to feel good, even if that means ignoring those who lie to you, ignoring those things that you disapprove of, and turning your undivided attention to the thing you desire. The film 'the Secret' highlights the importance of feeling good. When we feel good we attract more things to feel good about. Like attracts like.
Your friend in unlimited possibility,
With Awareness Comes Freedom
Entry # 29
There is freedom that comes with awareness, because with it comes the opportunity to make a choice.
Life is a journey comprised of many steps on our personal path that takes us down a winding road of constant evolution. And each day, we are provided with a myriad of opportunities that can allow us to transform into our next best selves. One moment we are presented with an opportunity to react differently when yet another someone in our life rubs us the wrong way; on another day we may find ourselves wanting to walk away from a particular circumstance but are not sure if we can. Eventually, we may find ourselves stuck in a rut that we can never seem to get out of. We may even make the same choices over and over again because we don't know how to choose otherwise. Rather than moving us forward, our personal paths may take us in a seemingly never-ending circle where our actions and choices lead us nowhere but to where we've already been. It is during these moments that awareness can be the first step to change.
Awareness is when we are able to realise what we are doing. We observe ourselves, noticing our reactions, actions, and choices as if we were a detached viewer. Awareness is the first step to change because we can't make a change unless we are aware that one needs to be made in the first place. We can then begin understanding why we are doing what we are doing. Afterwards, it becomes difficult not to change because we are no longer asleep to the truth behind our behaviours. We also begin to realise that, just as much as we are the root source behind the causes for our behaviours, we are also the originator for any changes that we want to happen.
There is a freedom that comes with awareness. Rather than thinking that we are stuck in a repetitive cycle where there is no escape, we begin to see that we very much play a hand in creating our lives. Whether we are aware of them or not, our behaviours and choices are always ours to make. Our past and our present no longer have to dictate our future when we choose to be aware. We are then free to move beyond our old limits, make new choices, and take new actions. With awareness, our paths can't help but wind us forward in our lives while paving the way for new experiences and new ways of being. It is through awareness that we can continue to consciously evolve.
When The Path Gets Rocky...
Entry # 28
Today was a beautiful sunny day and so for the first time this week I decided to go into my garden to see how much more my fruits and vegetables had grown and water them.
As I walked through the garden, I was reminded of all the unpredictable things that have occurred in my life, especially in the last few months, and how challenging the path to success has been at times. You know, we all like to have a clear path in front of us. But, sometimes there is a groove in the road...or we lose our step...or the terrain gets a bit rough.
You see, dear friend, being in nature reminds me that not everything is within our control. We can create plans, or come up with strategies, or follow a GPS to our destination. We know WHERE we want to go or HOW we want to live.
But, what we tend to forget is that sometimes we have to go THROUGH a storm in order to get TO our destination. At times we have to go through some rough terrain and we may even have to alter our course to get to that 'mountaintop'.
The mountaintop is the decision...the non-negotiable...it’s the “WHAT”...it's the destination. HOW we get there might change. Because we can start down one path, but discover there’s a big tree in the way, or a little lake we didn’t know was just around the bend.
When we dream and plan, we sometimes forget that between us and the mountaintop is the path. And that path can be rocky, turbulent, dirty and full of unknowns. But it doesn’t change the fact that the mountaintop is ours to be had, and the decision to create our own path is ours!
As we journey towards our dreams, the path may become unclear and the terrain may seem too rough to negotiate. In those times we have to remind ourselves to STOP for a moment and to RECALIBRATE, instead of getting frustrated, running out of gas, or giving up and saying that things didn’t work out for us. We really need to learn how to stop and remind ourselves that just because things might not have worked the way we expected them to, does NOT mean they won’t work at all.
Your friend in unlimited possibility,
“Focus on what you want rather than on what you don’t want. Your thoughts create your reality.”
Entry # 27
In every moment, you need to be aware of how your own thoughts shape your experiences. It’s, therefore, crucial for you to focus on what you want to keep up the positive flow of energy in your life.
When you focus on the good things, you are actively choosing your thoughts. Thoughts always have an effect. When you feel down and tend to think negative thoughts, these affirm the not-so-great energies in your life. So, before any doubtful, unhelpful thoughts take hold in your mind, make a real effort to move on from these. Live from a place of gratitude and positivity and your world will always be good. Even if something negative happens, you will be able to move on from it with ease.
Practice moving on from unhelpful thoughts. When you feel one creeping in and trying to take hold, release it and view your situation as positive. Hold only loving positive thoughts and love will come your way!
Your friend in unlimited possibility,
Knowing Your Own Worth
Entry # 26
Our Worth is not a product of our intelligence, our talent, our looks, or how much we have accomplished.
Though much of who and what we are changes as we journey through life, our inherent worth remains constant. While the term self-worth is often used interchangeably with self-esteem, the two qualities are inherently different. Self-esteem is the measure of how you feel about yourself at a given moment in time. Your worth, however, is not a product of your intelligence, your talent, your looks, your good works, or how much you have accomplished. Rather it is an immeasurable and unchanging manifestation of your eternal and infinite oneness with the universe. It represents the cornerstone of the dual foundations of optimism and self-belief. Your worth cannot be taken from you or damaged by life's rigours, yet it can easily be forgotten or even actively ignored. By regularly acknowledging your self-worth, you can ensure that you never forget what an important, beloved, and special part of the universe you are.
You are born worthy of love and of every good thing life has to offer. Your worth is intertwined with your very being. Your concept of your own self-worth is thus reinforced by your actions. Each time you endeavour to appreciate yourself, treat yourself kindly, define your personal boundaries, be proactive in seeing that your needs are met, and broaden your horizons, you express your recognition of your innate value. During those periods when you have lost sight of your worth, you will likely feel mired in depression, insecurity, and a lack of confidence. You'll pursue a counterfeit worth based on judgement rather than the beauty that resides within. When you feel worthy, however, you will accept yourself without hesitation. It is your worth as an individual who is simultaneously interconnected with all living beings that allows you to be happy, confident, and motivated. Because your conception of your worth is not based on the fulfillment of expectations, you'll see your mistakes and failures as just another part of life's journey.
Human beings are very much like drops of water in an endless ocean. Our worth comes from our role as distinct individuals as well as our role as an integral part of something larger than ourselves. Simply awakening to this concept can help you rediscover the copious and awe-inspiring worth within each and every one of us.
From Evelyne, your friend in unlimited possibility.
If this post has helped you in any way, share it with your friends and family. They will love and appreciate you even more for it.
Learn To Forgive And Be Free!
Entry # 25
“It is only through forgiveness that you grow as a person.”
When we learn to forgive, miracles can and do occur. It can be hard to let go when you have been hurt and betrayed. However, it’s crucial for you to find it in yourself to do this. Holding onto negativity and blame only drags you down and disconnects you from your Higher Self. Whether you have to forgive yourself or someone else, now is the time!
It’s now time to make a move forward from all the sadness and pain others have caused you. Even if it is yourself that you have trouble forgiving, know that today is the first day of the rest of your life. It’s time to release any guilt or ill will you are carrying. Give yourself credit for having tried to do your best even though you may not be so happy with the results!
Today is the perfect day for forgiving yourself and others. Focus on all the good aspects of life. You are moving forwards. Ask the Universe to help you to forgive yourself and others. You will soon be feeling lighter, brighter and a whole lot happier!
Your friend in unlimited possibility,
Our Thoughts Create Our Reality
Entry # 23
Our thoughts are powerful forces in the creation of our experience of life. During the day, we can monitor our thoughts to see if we're investing our energy where it is useful and harness the power of our thoughts to actively create a positive reality. Throughout the day, we can monitor our thoughts so as to catch ourselves in the middle of investing our energy elsewhere--such as into belief in limitations and lack, and instead pull our focus back to the infinite possibilities of the present.
Taking a deep breath will help us center our thoughts on being in our bodies right now. Regular meditation will allow us to gain mastery over our minds so that we can still our thoughts to focus on the pureness of being. If we mentally dwell on the past or the future, we may miss the experience of living in the present moment. In truth, our only true reality is the present moment. Setting and visualizing goals is wonderful, but we can bring our thoughts into our current experience by taking steps to create them now.
Our minds are powerful tools that we can harness to create our reality. Through them we move the unformed energy of the universe into form, which gives us direction for our words and actions. Each thought is like a stone dropped into a lake, sending ripples out into our world to affect all they touch. We can choose our focus and how we invest our energy, which gives us the power to design our lives to be whatever we choose in each and every moment.
In Alignment With Our Life Purpose.
Entry # 22
With stress and anxiety plaguing more and more people today, the fastest solution is often a pill -- pills such as the many antidepressants seen on the market.
What if there were more natural ways to healing? What if given the chance your body could heal itself?
Contrary to what Big Pharmaceutical companies have led the masses to believe, popping a pill to suppress the symptoms in the short term while dealing with drug-inherent side effects doesn't sound like the best option.
Thankfully, today an increasing number of people turn to group meditations, modern spirituality, and natural healing. More and more people are learning how to tune in to what their body and soul are trying to tell them about their true life calling, so that they can begin creating a life that’s a joyful expression of their highest purpose by creating a crystal clear vision for what they’d love to be, do, have and give in the four key domains of their lives: health, relationships, vocation, and time & money freedom.
One very popular such natural healing technique is body scanning. Through body scanning you can discover how to tell what you feel in your own body, whether specific people, opportunities or actions you’re thinking about taking are IN or OUT of alignment with your life purpose. Through this very effective technique you can recognize and release limiting thought patterns, and instill new, more empowering ways of thinking that will support you in creating a life of joy, passion, purpose and contribution to the world.
For many centuries, Eastern phylosophers like Sufism, Zen and Hatha yoga have highlighted the importance of body states, how they impact our consciousness, and their relationship to stress.
More recently, (during the last century), a one time student of Sigmund Freud named Wilhelm Reich, inspired Western psychiatry's interest in the body's interaction with emotional conditions. Other therapies such as Alexander Lowens' bioenergetic therapy and Perls' Gestalt therapy also closely focus on the relationship between the mind and the body.
By developing an awareness and understanding of how your own body responds to stress and other anxiety-provoking situations, you will receive important information about your personal stress response. This information will prove vital in the development of a stress-management plan designed just for you.
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Until next time.